Sonny's Blues

First off, this is definitely one of my most favorite pieces of literature we've had to read in class so far. I could actually relate in a way. I've had to watch my oldest brother go through things because of drugs that I would never wish on anyone. Like Sonny, he's a kind and smart guy who could do so many things in life, but for some reason chose to "kill himself". I found sad how Sonny explained the feeling and reason behind using heroin. I pray this wasn't the reason for my brother using meth and other drugs. It was like he used it because there was no other way around it. Almost as if it chose him instead of him choosing it. Isabel kind of reminded me of myself because even though I would know my brother was high on nights he'd come to visit I would pretend as if nothing happened and just show him love and try to just talk to him about life. In a sense, Sonny's brother reminded me of myself too. I want so bad to "save" my brother and to never let him fall back into the drugs again (considering he's out of it), but I've had to move on with my own life too. I feel as if when I see him again he'll be a completely different person, just like Sonny was to his brother. There are times I've wanted to scream at my brother for doing what he's doing to himself and to his daughters, but I know it won't solve anything. I believe in the end Sonny cleaned up. He may not have gotten completely away from the people and the night life, but the drugs, I think he kept away from has much as he can. At least I'd like to think so. It makes me feel like if Sonny could then my brother can too.

Painting of Joel

"A Grief Observed" Chapters 3-4/Cemetery

Going to the cemetery this morning was better than I expected. Not that I went in with low expectations, I just didn't think I would get out of it what I did. Walking around for 40 minutes brought to light things about the dead I had never really thought of. I thought about things like, these people all had lives and all that's left to their life is a name and date on a tombstone. And on that tombstone is a dash between their birth and death. That dash represents their life. I couldn't help but think, "Wow, that's what I'm going to be remembered as...a dash."

In reading the last two chapters I kept going back and forth from anger to sadness. As he was thinking of H throughout his writing, I thought of my mom while reading this. Reading what he thought opened up a lot in me of what I thought, but had never said out loud. It made me angry to wonder why God would do this. Why wouldn't he at least let her live a little longer so I could have more memories of her. I was six, but I still had an inkling of knowledge that she may not be here forever. As did C.S. Lewis. It's really not fair to take a parent from a child is it? Or even a wife from a husband? I know God has His reasons that we don't understand, but can't He at least help us out with understanding it? It felt nice reading this because it was like talking to someone who knows how I feel. He understands that no matter how long after the death, there will still be times of sadness. However, it will also get easier to not be angry all of the time and think of the good times. In the end, even though I didn't get all the answers I wish I could, (I don't think he did either) I know for sure God is in control and one day I will find out why death had to happen like this.

C.S. Lewis "A Grief Observed" Chap. 1-2

Well, this is a very depressing book to read. It's really interesting, though. I can relate to it in some ways because my mother died 13 years ago. And yes, I've grieved many times over her death, but I've never even thought to take the time to actually observe it. I'm almost afraid to because I feel like I'd become obsessed with it rather than moving on. This book is kind of opening my eyes, but I'm still a little skeptical of it, for now.
If I was to relate these first two chapters to any of the other texts I've read, I'd have to say it relates to "What We Talk About When We Talk About Love" and " This Blessed House" the most. Mainly because they both have to do with relationships.
It relates to "What We Talk About When We Talk About Love" because they both talk about being in love and the different diversities of it. There are times of absolute love and other times of anger and resentment. I think at times C.S. Lewis loved H with all his heart, but resented God for her having cancer.
"This Blessed House" relates to this story because, even though Sanjeev wasn't the greatest guy, he made sacrifices for Twinkle, just like C.S. Lewis made sacrifices for his wife. Agreed, it wasn't fair that he had to go through the things he did and suffer along with her as well as Sanjeev suffered with Twinkle with the annoying things she did, but all in all there was love there.
I'm probably going to have to go back a couple of times and re-read this book. I'm just having a hard time writing about it and comparing with other because I think I'm going to have to get on a "deeper" level when read this.

The Book of Joel-Images

In Chapter 1 of the Book of Joel, it talks about starvation and drought. It says:
To You, O LORD, I cry;
For fire has devoured the pastures of the wilderness
And the flame has burned up all the trees of the field.
Even the beasts of the field pant for You;
For the water brooks are dried up
And fire has devoured the pastures of the wilderness.
When I read this I had a vivid image in my mind of blazing fire everywhere. Wherever it goes it's consuming what's around it. It's burning pastures and trees and animals and all of the water is dried up. It's not a pretty picture to imagine, but it definitely stands out.
In Chapter 2, it talks about the Day of the Lord. It says:

"I will display wonders in the sky and on the earth,
Blood, fire and columns of smoke.
"The sun will be turned into darkness
And the moon into blood
Before the great and awesome day of the LORD comes.
"And it will come about that whoever calls on the name of the LORD
Will be delivered;
While reading this, I imagined blood, fire, and smoke in the sky. The sun was the fire and then turned black as smoke while the moon turned red as blood. Even though this doesn't sound like a very appealing image, it's exciting because I know when this happens that the Lord has come and those who are saved will be delivered.
My favorite image is in Chapter 3 where it talks about Judah being blessed. It says:

And in that day
The mountains will drip with sweet wine,
And the hills will flow with milk,
And all the brooks of Judah will flow with water;
And a spring will go out from the house of the LORD
To water the valley of Shittim.
I imagined beautiful green mountains dripping with waterfalls of sweet, red wine. Then hills flowing with milk down its sides. And every brook that was dry was filled with the clearest and most blue water ever. And where the house of the Lord is there's the most exotic and beautiful stream that watered the deslote valley of Shittim.

The Book of Joel

I actually found it kind of difficult to find a beautiful line in the poem. Most of it just talked about destruction and starvation and drought. Not until I got to the end was when I found something that sounded beautiful. It's when it talks about Judah being blessed. 

And in that day

The mountains will drip with sweet wine,

And the hills will flow with milk,

And all the brooks of Judah will flow with water;

And a spring will go out from the house of the LORD

To water the valley of Shittim.

Egypt will become a waste,

And Edom will become a desolate wilderness,

Because of the violence done to the sons of Judah,

In whose land they have shed innocent blood.

Reading the first part aloud sounded so beautiful to me because not only hearing it was beautiful, but imagining this scenery in my head was beautiful. It sounds like a place I would love to spend for the rest of my life. Somewhere with mountains and springs is exactly how I'd love to live. I looked up what Shittim looks like and it's actually not a very appealing place. However it has these trees with Shittim wood and it take the whole look of this dry valley and makes it somewhat beautiful. In the second part of the poem it talks about Egypt becoming waste and other places being desolate and what not. It reminds of the Shittim tree because it's like while everything around it erodes and falls away, these trees stay beautiful and grow. So comparing this to the first part of the poem is kinda of like Judah is the tree and Egypt and Edom is the valley and eroding rocks around the tree. I just thought the use of Shittim fits in perfect with the poem.

A Story about the Body

For such a short story I found this story having a lot of meaning to it. I'm glad I read it three times because the first time I was dumbfounded. For one, this story shows me how shallow guys can be. It's amazing how great he thought she was at the beginning of the story then once he found out she didn't have breasts his interest in her completely went away. Sure, it sucks for him in a sexual way, but there is so much more to his lady or any lady for that matter than her breasts! With the way he described her in the beginning you would think he was in love with her. Except when you're in love with someone it doesn't matter if they don't have all of the qualities you're looking for. I think the point of her leaving a bowl with rose petals with bees in the bottom was a representation of what he thought of her. He loved how she looked on the outside and everything about her work. But once he got passed all that and found something personal about her and didn't like it he saw her like he saw those dead bees. Even though this was written 22 years ago, it can relate to today too. A lot of guys will see what they like, but once that girl opens up to them and gets personal they leave and move on to the next fling they can get. Of course not all guys are like this, but many are. So in a way, guys and girls can relate to this story. Almost every girl has told a guy they want to be with him and he agrees, but once she opens up to him and he finds something he doesn't like he runs. And almost every guy has liked a girl but once he found something that wasn't adequate enough for him he dropped it like a hot potato.

My Short Story-Love In The Subway

It’s half past two. Not many people are roaming around the subways at this time of the night. Well, not the “normal” kind anyways, especially in New York. There is one man in particular, though.  His name is Landon. He’s a young, up-coming lawyer who gets barely enough pay to keep his lights on. He hopes to get a bonus after the late night at the office he just had. Normally, he takes a cab home, but for some reason there were no cabs when he got out of the office. So he has to take the subway. He hates the subway. The way it smells, looks, and mainly the hippies and hobos who have ruined their lives due to alcohol and drugs. He sees his reflection in the windows of the subway train as it passes by and wonders, “Am I just like them?” Sure he was a nice looking guy with a clean shaven face, wearing a suit that makes him look more prestigious than he really is. That was only his outward appearance, though. On the inside he was like those hippies and hobos in the sense he was addicted to something. Not to alcohol, drugs, or porn. He was addicted to finding true love. He grew up with brothers and sisters who found love early in life and are living happily with their nice houses and cars and children who make straight A’s. Normally, this would make someone happy, but for Landon this makes him angry. Only because that’s what he longs for most in life. All of his life he has searched for the one just knowing and believing she would be coming into his life any day. Now, he was nearly 30 with nothing more than his dog, Ferrari, to keep him company. As he contemplates all of this in his mind, he turns to put his briefcase down and there she is. The most magnificent of a being he has ever seen. Images shoot through his mind of them together. All of the way from dating, to marriage, to having a family, to growing old together. Even though it seems ridiculous to even imagine those things, he can’t help it. He has this feeling inside he has never felt before; a longing for someone. He begins to study her from a distance. Her long blonde, slightly curled hair, her v-neck t-shirt that fit her body just right, her jeans that formed around every curve, her western boots that seemed to be worn in, and best of all is that she’s alone. He doesn’t notice a ring on her finger either. He isn’t close enough to get too detailed pictures of her face and height, but he wants to. Just as he is about to make his way closer to her, the subway train pulls up. He prays she gets on. She picks up her bag and walks onto the train. He hurries on, trying to sit close, but not too close so she doesn’t notice him looking at her. She takes out her iPod and beings listening to some music. Slowly, his mind begins to wonder and he then starts to daydream about her. He imagines her horseback riding or surfing or even cooking a meal for the both of them. He finally comes back into reality and has this profound confidence to go and sit by her. Right as he’s about to, she gets a phone call. She sets her iPod down and talks for almost 20 minutes. He knosw he is getting close to his destination and fears he doesn’t have much longer with her. The intercom comes on and announces the next stop. He feels like his heart is in his stomach. There was maybe a minute left before the stop. He prays like he’s never prayed before. He hopes she’ll at least get off the phone long enough for him to catch her name. Instead, she continues to keep talking. The train stops, she gets up, grabs her bag, and walks out the door. Just as the door closes she gets off the phone, turns around, and looks him straight in the eyes. He feels frozen. He doesn’t know whether to wave or look away. He then notices a distressed look on her face. The train begins to move again and all he can do is sit there and watch everything that could’ve been become smaller and smaller. Landon began to wonder, “Why did she look so distressed?” What was going through her head as she was staring at me?”  A million questions are running through his mind. Then, it hit him. He looked over and saw her iPod laying there on the seat. He walks over and picks it up. It was a fairly new one with a blue cover on it. He notices his heart is beating out of his chest. He can’t believe he actually has something that could draw them together. But how?  iPod’s don’t have names and phone numbers in them. He starts fiddling with it anyways looking through all of her music, account, and some pictures here and there. There’s a leap in his heart when he sees different artists that he too likes. She has a picture of her and an older woman he thinks to be her mom. Her teeth are beautifully straight and white. Her face is flawless and her eyes are as blue as the sky itself. After minutes of finding nothing to link him to her, he decides to take the cover off. He feels something rough on the back. He flips it over and there it is. Property of Lily Buchanan was etched in the metal of the iPod. He can’t believe his eyes. Her name is just as beautiful as she is. He knew this had to be it. Everything is linking up some perfectly. He normally wouldn’t say he believes in love at first sight. His view has been drastically changed. On a night that seemed impossible to be happy with, he believes he finally found the one thing he has looked and waited for his whole life. True love.

This Blessed House-Character Analysis of Twinkle

a) Twinkle is a very pretty, young Indian woman, who likes to get dressed up and look good. Her face was very girlish looking and had untroubled eyes. Her name in itself shows she's a fun girl. In the story it states she loved to wear high heels, some that were three inches and leopard print. This shows that she's fun and likes to be seen. It also said that she wore some black stirrup pants and a yellow chenille sweater. So she can still look cute dressing down too. It also says that she had an appointment for a manicure and pedicure before the party so she doesn't like to just dress good, but look good all the way around. What she wears to the party is also described as very elegant and classy, but fun at the same time. Twinkle definitely has a sense of style.
b) "Guess what I found", was the first thing Twinkle said in the story. By this first statement, it proved to me that she was a fun girl, not wanting to just tell Sanjeev what it is she found, but to play a game with him to figure it out. When she says, "I would feel terrible throwing them away," shows that she is also a very caring person. Even to people she doesn't know. Twinkle also made compromises with Sanjeev by telling him she would hide her new "treasures" behind the door or out of the way in the lawn. Twinkle also did not have the same taste in music as Sanjeev did because when he was listening to his music she told him to turn it off because it was putting her to sleep. Twinkle also proved that she doesn't care what people think by constantly asking Sanjeev why he always cares what people think because clearly she doesn't care. I also noticed that Twinkle is very outgoing and definitely a people person. She knows how to start a conversation and to keep guests entertained with different stories she would tell and what not.
c) Twinkle definitely likes to smoke. She's constantly smoking throughout the story. Usually, smoking is a release of stress and other things. So I assume her smoking was a way of just letting her troubles go. Twinkle also likes to tease Sanjeev. I noticed this by the way she carried herself the times when she would squeeze his leg or his arm. She likes to read when she's bored, but also talk to her girlfriends on the phone. I think this shows she's easily entertained. She's also very carefree because she leaves clothes at the front of her closet, would read whatever magazine, and listen to whatever song on the radio. She gets excited by the little things in life. Like when Sanjeev always refilled her glass when they would go out together. As fun loving and carefree as she is though, she likes to read things like Sonnets and German films and was getting her masters degree. So Twinkle was also very intelligent. Even though she was not the greatest in the kitchen, she came up with a dish on her own and it even tasted good. This shows she's creative too. I also think that Twinkle liked to keep her emotions to her since she cried once in the story and that was the only time Sanjeev had ever seen her cry. I don't think she was crying just because of statue, but it had built up and that was the final straw. Twinkle also shows leadership. She took it upon herself to entertain the guests and get them interested in something they probably wouldn't normally be interested in. But by her enthusiasm she got them excited and they followed her wherever she went.
d) Sanjeev responded to Twinkle in many ways. In one instance, he would dote on her and how they met. In another he showed how much he cared by doing little things for her. Including holding her while she cried and compromising with her. On the other hand, he talked a lot about how annoying she was and would belittle her throughout the whole story. When the party guests arrived they ended up adoring Twinkle. They were with her the whole time and stayed by her side through her endeavors of finding a new "treasure". I can't decide if it made him jealous or even more annoyed. To me, it didn't seem that he truly loved her by the way he talked about her and to her.
e) The only thoughts that were shown was about Sanjeev and what he thought about Twinkle. The story didn't share hardly any of Twinkles' thoughts. Only about how much Sanjeev thought of Twinkle.
All in all, I think Twinkle has the whole package, minus the being organized and tidy part.